Trust is something we’ve learned easily to do as a kid. Don’t stick the fork in the outlet. You can’t run with scissors. Paper towels can’t go in the toilet. Santa Claus is real. We believed it all. Why? ‘Cause we trusted our parents, our guardians, our older siblings, cousins, and friends who told us so. We didn’t test to see if it was true or not. Or at least most of us haven’t! Trust comes to kids different here in Guatemala and Casa Shalom.
Most have come in due to rough backgrounds. Maybe it was alcoholism, being left without a caretaker, abuse (verbally, physically, and/or sexually), loss of a family member, or being lost out in the real world, all alone. Some were rescued from boxes along the side of the road, while others are saved covered in scrapes, bruises, scars, or burns. Most have never gone to a doctor appointment or a day of school. Some don’t know who or where their parents are. Families have survived on a tortilla a day, while others, as young as 5 years old, were working just to get a meal. These kids don’t know the meaning of the word “trust”.
I am working to restore that bit of trust in each child I interact with. I am showing them that I will be there for them whenever they need it most. I won’t leave them. I may be absent for a week or two of travel, but I’ll be back. I will return. I will be checking in on them to see how they are doing, where they need help, how I can be more than just another part of their past they struggle to forget. I will be there to teach them a new art project, to help them climb the stairs for the first time, to show them how to solve a multiplication problem, or when they want to know who God is and what He can do for them if only they trust.
Last week, the visiting group took the kids to the pools. I got to tag along, to be of assistance to the house parents and to have a little fun myself! I sat in a bus of a shared by 3 8-10 year old boys. On the way there, one asked me if we could have a race in the pools. He was so excited to tell me that he followed (trusted) my guidance and he learned to swim during our previous pool visit. The race is suspended until next time, since I was given the job by one of the house moms to look after one of their girls who needs a bit more help. She was afraid to enter the pool, fearing that she’d slip on the edge leading in. I didn’t blame her. It was almost a beach entry pool, with the entryway being made of slippery tile and more like a slope, rather than a gradual decline. I myself had to run in to make sure I didn’t fall either. I grabbed both of her hands as tightly as I could, with my feet firm on the flat ground, and talked with her, letting her know that she could trust me. The first time, it took her a few minutes to gain the confidence to enter in, but after a couple of times, she held my hand and jumped right in, as it was nothing. I gave her a few ideas of things we could do in and around the pool. Still, she was fearful, but she knew she could trust me. It’s all about building trust.
One day, I was helping the kids with art therapy. Their artwork was to be all their own, without the handiwork of a friend, guardian, or volunteer. One of the boys wanted me to draw a star on his page. I told him that he had the capabilities to create a star. I took a pencil and drew out a star for him, counting 1 to 5 with each line I drew, so that he could follow along and learn. Once he drew all 5 lines himself, with my counting voice to help guide him, he was so proud of himself and excited to know that he was capable. It’s trusting in their own abilities and the guidance to follow.
Sometimes, my skin makes it hard for me to connect immediately with kids. With new kids coming into the orphanage every couple of weeks, there are always new eyes to see this many freckles on a person for the first time. It’s new to them, They are fearful of a skin disease I may have or that I haven’t showered in who knows how long! I am persistent in being open to them, showing them that I care for them, love them, and want to be a part of their life. After some time, may it be a few minutes, hours, or weeks, they begin to take those walls down, remove their fears, and begin to trust in me, that I identify with much more than my unique skin. It’s about staying consistent with showing those qualities in expectation and hope of trust.
The village outreaches have been eye opening for me. All they know is the closeness of their community, neighbors, family members, and friends. As soon as I entered the village for the first time ever, the kids were bouncing with excitement and screaming “GRINGOS!” in seeing strangers who didn’t speak their language fluently. They are happy to welcome more and more people into their circle of trust. Walking through cornfields en route to the nearby “soccer” field, I had a five-year-old holding my hand, guiding me the entire way. She stood less than 3 feet tall and was showing me she could trust me and that I could trust her to keep steady on the narrow winding pathway. Our next visit there, I had a boy come up and give me a hug to welcome me. He didn’t leave. He stayed leaning against my side, knowing I could be trusted and am quick to show him love.
With my recent states visit, there was about a month in between my recent visits to the village we usually go to. I had a bunch of kids running up to me, hugging me, and asking where have I been! I got down in the dirt playing with one little girl and her dolls, then stood up after my knees started getting weak and I saw another girl coming to play. She didn’t want to play. She stood right at my side, tucked herself underneath my arm, and knew she was safe, with me rubbing her, smiling to her, and playing with her hair. She knew she could trust me, in that I was faithful to return after a quick visit home.
(har)Perseverance on a mission 